From eCloud to Open Skies

FROM eCLOUD TO OPEN SKIES

by

MURALI MURTHY

Aakash - The Sky

20 years in the IT industry, Aakash worked for couple of IT companies.

Ambitious and eyes filled with big dreams, Aakash always believed he could be more, and do more than just working on some monotonous projects and under guidance of someone.

He always wanted to work independently as he knew he had it in him to setup his own company.

Aakash was at the peak of his career, as he was earning well, staying happily with parents and wife.
His lovely wife Meera was more a friend than a wife and were happy in their own little world, they loved travelling and partying.

Love for Nature

They both saw a dream together to retire and settle down in their own plantation somewhere in Udupi.

Despite their colourful world in the tall city lights, deep rooted in the city culture, fast life, the mad and material comfort of the city life...they always liked the sun, moon, starry nights, green pastures, mountains, water and plantations.
That's the reason they liked to take a break from the city life and be a part of the Nature, and this desire made them to start loving the experience of travelling and the Journeys.

Aakash especially loved living amidst greenery, away from the hustle and bustle of city life and taking care of plantation.

Every time Aakash visited Meera's ancestral home in Udupi, his urge to lead a calm life, stress-free and simple living got more certain.
The entire family there had a very relaxing time, they bonded well sitting on the Jagali (a huge platform) sipping on the filter coffee, having casual Conversations in the backdrop of chirping birds, mooing cows and sounds of the trees and insects, the fresh and unpolluted air to breathe.

His stay at such traditional, classic houses was a dream come true for Aakash. The thatched roof, red oxide floors, wooden pillars, ethnic kitchen, huge open spaces and a huge well with clear and sweet water. Sumptuous traditional meal with local flavours of vegetables and spices, Walk in the plantation, drinking coconut water during the afternoons - Aakash used to lust for such a lifestyle.

Entrepreneurship

Back to his life in the City, one fine day he made up his mind and took the leap. He said goodbye to the company he worked in, and started to work on building his network.

He built his company from the scratch, brick by brick. He went through extreme difficult and financially strenuous times. He exhausted all his savings and compromised on his comfortable lifestyle. With a small team of 15 people, Aakash setup a Cloud Services company providing Facility Maintenance & Upkeep Software services, and started to realize his dreams.
Though the company generated moderate revenues, it was self sufficient and could feed the expenses on its own.
Aakash was content and took pride in running his own company and generating his own money.

Despite difficult times, constant stress, pressure to lead and drive the company forward entirely on his own shoulders, he enjoyed the freedom, the pride in providing employment.

Aakash was young, full of ideas, energetic and confident. Soon did he realize that those were not enough to sustain, grow and succeed. He also realized he needed a much bigger appetite to take risks, commitment and sacrifice, and needed direction and a different breed to be a successful entrepreneur. But as he had already taken the plunge, he found ways to swim and handle situations as it came.

He got a kick when his friends glorified his designation as a Director.
He kept himself motivated and survived daily challenges, demands and lived by the day. He believed in his dream and hoped to make it big one day.

Nomad's Havoc

Somewhere far in the UK, a new disease was creating a Panic. People suffering this disease would get diarrhea, and worsened within 7 days. The dehydration in the infected was so extreme, that it started to take lives.

As this disease was spreading rapidly, the medical world named it as Nomad.

The disease spread was so rampant, that it kept sweeping country by country. It spread to US, UAE, Saudi and eventually reached India as well.

Nomad was spreading like a wildfire and it was soon declared world crisis and a Pandemic.
To stop the spread of the disease, the Govt declared Lock-down. A Lock-down would mean human contact would be completely cut off and every person to stay at home.
All businesses, including Aakash's had to stop operating from Office.
The Lock-down was declared for 3 months, which meant Aakash had to sustain huge losses, as all his customers had stopped their operations as well.

All Businesses were experiencing major impact, no matter how established the businesses were. It was becoming challenging for Businesses to keep their financial wheels turning during the Lock-down due to no or very low revenue churn.

The impact on Startups and Small Businesses like Aakash's was brutal, as he had lean cash reserves to survive the "No Revenue" phase. He struggled to pay Salaries each month, and decided to cut salaries by 30% to ensure Business Continuity. He himself couldn't take home Salary during these 3 months.

The ripple affect on overall economy had deep impact on many businesses whose services depended on Facility and Infrastructure of other organizations.

Many bigger organizations also started to find ways to cut cost, cut down their infrastructure, facility and manpower, to tide the slowdown.

Aakash's business suffered huge losses as there were no new sales, existing customers either withdrew contract or asked him to work for much lesser rate.
This resulted in low revenue generation and Aakash couldn't sustain paying Salaries to Employees. He had to take the painful step to fire his Employees one by one, and eventually forcing him to shut shop, as the future looked very bleak and did not have clarity on future prospects.

Meera - The Savior

Aakash was going through mixed feelings and emotions. He was emotionally floored, he saw the downfall of his dream, his business that he built sacrificing a lot, putting in sweat and blood.

This had a bad impact on his health and went into depression.
It was difficult time for family and Meera especially. Meera constantly counselled him how things were not in his control and he is not responsible for the situation. Meera helped him come out of the depression, the guilty feeling after 1 month of efforts.
She did not take him to any Doctor, as she was confident that she could get her husband back from the dark with her Love, Care and some counselling. She successfully convinced him that he didn't do anything wrong and no wrong steps taken by him, that resulted in the situation. Meera kept telling him that it is a Natural Disaster and no one was spared from the bad times caused by the Pandemic.
Meera never cried in front of him, she stood strong and provided shoulders for Aakash to Cry on.
Meera after 1 month of constant wooing and convincing, ensured Aakash realize that he needs to move on and find alternate ways of making money and fulfill his responsibility and duty to take care of family's financial needs.

Aakash now started to figure out "What Next". Nomad had left all the Companies with lean revenues and none of them had plans to make new hires, especially the senior management.
Aakash's ego, self respect did not allow him to take up any ordinary job and take orders from Managers whom he believed are less qualified than him.
He was used to working independently, take decisions on his own and no one to answer to, but himself. It was extremely difficult for him to take up a job in the IT industry again. He thought it was even more humiliating to take up some job, more than closing his Company.
Even Meera couldn't convince him to take up a job in IT industry again.

He sat and started to think what else could he do to earn a decent amount, outside the IT industry. He had lost confidence to start any other Business, neither did he have any money to invest in any new venture.
He started to explore the Classifieds section everyday to get ideas on what else could he do. He didn't find any other talent or interest in him, apart from Travelling, Driving & Liking for Nature.

One day, his eyes lit up to see a Job Ad in the Classifieds "REQUIRED Estate Manager to handle 50 acre Private Coffee Estate in Virajapete, Kodagu. Candidate should be well versed in modern Coffee Plantation practices and must be familiar with the local environment. Competitive remuneration and perks, Please call us"
He ran to Meera with the News Paper in his hands, and excitingly told her about the Job Vacancy.
Though Meera was shocked at first, she didn't want to discourage Aakash, as she saw him happy after almost 4 months. She asked him to go ahead and give it a shot.

The Interview

Aakash called the Estate and scheduled a face to face Interview with the Estate Owner, in 2 days.
Those 2 days, Aakash was restless and had sleepless nights. He was confused, unaware of what he was getting into, if this was the right choice and lot of chaotic thoughts in his mind.
On the day of the Interview, he got up early and started driving to Virajapet, which was a 5 hours drive.

Aakash reached the Estate, and started driving inside the Estate. As he started to drive slowly, he was mesmerized with the pleasing sight of the Coffee plantations, Greenery, Beauty of the nature and the sweet silence.
As he reached the Farmhouse, he was awestruck with the Beauty of the house, exactly how he had dreamt and liked to have a Farmhouse in his retired life.

A confident Aakash was welcomed by an old Man with huge Mustache, who gave him a firm hand shake "I am Colonel Appayya, and own this Plantation. Welcome Aakash, Hope you didn't find any difficulty reaching the place?"

"Thank You Sir. It wasn't very difficult to find your property"

"Good, shall we discuss while we take a walk around?

"Sure. Sir, you have a very beautiful estate"

"Thanks Aakash. Keemale Estate is built over last 80 years. My father bought this and I am maintaining it now, after he passed away 10 years ago. It's spread across 50 acres and we mainly grow Coffee plants for it's seeds, roast it, ground it and we sell it to the Coffee Brewing companies"

"Wow, that's great Sir, very interesting indeed"

"I saw your Resume and I was about to throw it in trash, but was curious to know why have you applied for the job. Do you have any knowledge on Coffee Plantation or any experience with Plantations?"

"No Sir, I have absolutely no knowledge or experience in any kind of Plantation"

"Then why did you apply for the Job? At first, I thought you were joking. Do you even know the Job profile?"

"Yes Sir, I am aware of the Job requirement and responsibilities of the Job Profile. I understand you are looking for a Manager who can look after your Plantation, maintain it and help you implement modern Plantation practices and techniques"

"I have seen your Resume and I know your background and work experience in the Software world, and I am also aware of your stint starting a Company on your own. So, let me straight ask you the question, why do you think you are the right fit for the Job of an Estate Manager?"

"Sure. Firstly, I have over 20 years of experience in the Software Industry. In the Software Industry, we help our customers solve their problems, and technology is only an enabler or means to solve their problem.
In the Software Industry, nothing is constant, there are new things to learn every day.
And my 5 years stint as an Entrepreneur."

"That still doesn't answer why I should hire you."

"I am good in solving problems, understanding problems and logically coming up with a solution to the Problem. I am good in implementing Processes, and helping my customers improve their productivity using solutions and processes."

"Ok, now I am getting it. Go on.."

"I can learn new things very quickly on my own and master in it soon.
As an Entrepreneur, my leadership qualities, people management ability, self motivated abilities are well proven.
I think I can do a better job than any other candidate, because any other typical experienced Estate Managers would run your estate in a typical fashion. But, I bring in fresh thoughts, fresh ideas, new ways of running your Estate.
I am groomed and molded to think logically in everything I do. Learning the practices and process of growing Coffee should not be very difficult for me, and can be learnt in a week's time."

"How about your ability in managing laborers?"

"I always respected my Employees and treated them with compassion. Irrespective of their grade, designation or be an office boy, driver or a helper, I respected them as humans, worked with them as one team. I believe this is the best way to get best from them. I am proud of my team leading skills, my people management skills that I was able to successfully carry out through out my career. I would like to lead by example and help each subordinate to improve their skills. I would never do bossism over any of my team members, sit and give orders. I work with them and make them aware of their role in the overall system. And working with your Laborers will not be any different for me."

"That's impressive Aakash. I haven't come across anyone in the powerful position treat their employees as team, especially in unorganized sectors."

"Thank you sir. To summarize my candidature, I understand this is totally new to me, different working culture, different environment...but I would like to take this challenge and I strongly believe my leadership skills, people management ability, ability to learn new things quickly, problem solving ability will surely help me out and excel in this job too"

"Good. And you know it's not a 9 to 5 job, right?"

"Very much Sir, I am used to it. And as an Entrepreneur, there was no holiday nor specific hours I used to work, I was always thinking about my company, the work 24/7."

"And you will have to stay here in the Estate, will you and your family be Ok with it?"

"I would love to. I always loved Nature, Greenery and living amidst Nature. It was always my dream to buy an Estate, Ofcourse a much smaller one and lead my retired life in a Plantation. Though that dream might not be fulfilled fully, atleast I will be happy to start a living in such a Peaceful and Beautiful Plantation"

"One last Question, why didn't you find a Job in your Software field?"

"I had enough of it Sir. I am in my mid 40s and I can't take that stress anymore. Software world looks attractive from outside, but I have been in that for 25 years and it drains one down and bad for health. I am looking for peaceful life, away from the fast and artificial, superficial world. I need job satisfaction and something I love and enjoy doing"

"Come Aakash, it's already 2.00 PM, let's have Lunch"

Aakash and Col. Appayya had sumptuous, traditional Coorgi food. Col. Appayya was silent through out the lunch, while Aakash enjoyed the yummy lunch.

The New Innings

After their lunch, both sat on the Sofa and Col. Appayya goes on with his judgement "Well Aakash, I am completely impressed and I think it's a new beginning for both of us. You are confident, can take new challenges, self motivated and a good leader. I think me and my estate will surely benefit with your intelligence and smart way of working. I am also getting old, and I need an enthusiastic and dynamic Manager to look after my Estate, and I am alone here without any support.
However, I had my concerns on your adaptability to Plantation life, as you are used to the comfort and luxury of a City life. Also your ability to start fresh, adapt and learn to something completely new and different. You don't know the Local culture, language and have any local connect"

"Yes Sir, you are absolutely right, yet I believe my Love for Nature and all other abilities that I explained will help me do my job with utmost sincerity and am 100% confident about this"

"Yes, I have thought a lot during the Lunch and I am willing to take the risk. I am more than happy to hire you as my Estate Manager"

An Elated and happy Aakash gets up and excitingly "Thank you sir. Thank you very much. I wanted to get this job desperately, as I wanted a new beginning."

"Hold on Aakash. I am willing to take minimal risk and give both of us time to see if we both made the right choice. Let us get into 1 year contract and then decide based on where we stand after 1 year"

"Fair enough Sir. I think that's best for both of us"

Aakash reaches home later in the night, runs to Meera, lifts her up in the Air and says "I got the job. I was not so happy even when I got my first job"
A confused looking Meera asks "What's the offer, will you stay there?"

"It's a one year contract initially. We will be relocating to Coorg. We will be provided Quarters in the Farmhouse. The Salary is Rs. 50,000. I know it sounds less, but we will save on Food, House expenses completely. We will be provided with Car as well, so effectively no expenses"

A hesitant Meera goes with the flow and agrees for this new life.
They both move to their new Address Keemale Estate, Virajapete, Coorg.

Aakash and Meera find the Quarters in the Homestay much more comfortable and luxurious than their home in Bangalore. Both agree that Meera would stay 15 days in Keemale and other 15 days in Bangalore with his parents. Aakash has left the decision to bring the Parents to Keemale, after 1 year when the Contract gets renewed.

Aakash and Meera initially find it difficult to lead a normal life, as it's a completely new environment, new home, new people, new culture. They visit Mysore, Madikeri and Bangalore often to be in touch with City Life.

Within one month, Aakash learns their way of living, Plantation process, Coffee growing process and quickly starts to show progress.

He involves all Labourers in his decision making, takes their advice and opinion and makes a very friendly impression very soon.

Colonel Appayya sees a more positive and lively environment in his Plantation, as all the laborers and staff are happy with Aakash leading them.

Aakash in his free time, starts Developing Apps and Softwares to track stock, Employee Attendance, monitor duty hours. He builds various MIS and Analytics to measure performance, efficiency, improve productivity and profitability He starts building trends of monsoon and summer impact on the plantation.

He prepared PPTs to present this to Colonel Appayya to show the progress.
Colonel Appayya is fully impressed with his new, creative and efficient way of managing his Plantation. Meera assists Aakash in managing the property, she starts to take care of the Farmhouse, the maids, the kitchen and general running of the Estate.

Aakash becomes more than an Employee, as Col. Appayya now sees him as his Son and Meera as his Daughter In Law.
Aakash finds happiness in his work and is enjoying working at Keemale.

1 year quickly passes by, and Col. Appayya invites both Aakash and Meera for Dinner, where he had also invited few close relatives and friends and amongst the gathering, Col. Appayya announces "Aakash, you have become more than a Manager for Keemale Estate. You and Meera have taken good care as if it's your own. I am so happy that I made the right choice and hired you, you didn't let me down. I have absolutely no doubt that you can now be appointed as this Estate's Manager permanently.
I am getting old, and I have to be with my Son and his family in the U.S.A. I will be moving to U.S.A next week and you will be the whole and sole of this Estate.
You need not any longer stay in the Quarters, but move to the main Farmhouse along with Meera and your parents. This letter in my Hand is a Power Of Attorney and you are given a freehand on this Estate, all the best"
While all the guests clap continuously for 5 minutes, Aakash and Meera have tears in their eyes, as the new job has given them new life. They can't imagine this success, given the condition an year ago.
Nomad came as a blessing in disguise to Aakash and family.

6 months later, Aakash and family are happily living their new life, and one fine day a Lawyer drops by and explains Aakash "I am sorry to share the sad news...Colonel Appayya has expired 3 days ago. Before leaving to U.S.A, Col. Appayya had got his WILL done with me and asked me to share it with you when the time came. And the Will says The Plantation, the Farmhouse will now be owned by you. You are required to share 50% of the Coffee seed sales profits with his Son every year. He knew you would expand the business and diversify. You need to share only the profits from Coffee seed sales profits"

Aakash goes on to improve profitability by bringing in efficient processes in place, starts growing Cardamom, Vanilla and other high profit produce.
He also ventures into Homestay and starts earning huge profits.
Aakash also further improvises his Software and starts to commercially sell the Software to help other Estates in and around Coorg, to be more productive and profitable.

We are Married for Life! But what about Love?

WE ARE MARRIED FOR LIFE! BUT WHAT ABOUT LOVE?

by

MURALI MURTHY

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. They say love in the marriage fades as the years pass by. The attraction, the spice, romance tapers down as the couple gets used to each other. Indeed it does!

• Is it because the Man loses interest easily?
• Is it because Woman lose charm and the curves quickly after marriage?
• Is it the domestic issues, conflict with in-laws? If so, are the couple who stay separately happy and in love?
• Is it financial stress?
• Is it the work pressure?

The List goes on and each of us choose our own reasons to defend oneself, and blame it on the partner or the environment.

It so happens after few years of marriage (which can start from 1 year to 7 years in some cases) that the Love in the marriage becomes monotonous.
Did I say Love gets Monotonous??
Does Love get Monotonous or is it Life that gets into a uniform mode that Love seems to become repetitive.

Anything repetitive, unexciting tends to become tedious and boring.
Is that why most couples start fighting and get irritated for every conflict?

When two different people start to live together and share their life, it is obvious they both need to compromise, as they come from contrasting background, lifestyle, habits.

A couple happily accept all the differences and adjust to each other in the initial years, but the same differences become irritations and many a times causes irreparable damage and a crack on the wall.

What holds them together in the initial years is the factor called Love and once it vanishes - the conflicts, irritations, misunderstandings sets in.

Should we be trying to find reasons why Love fades or should we be trying to find solutions to the problem?

Let's try both.

Love loses intensity over a period of time. From psychology standpoint, the relation shifts from Passionate Love to Long term attachment, as the couple looks at long term companionship rather than the attractions, intimacy and Love.

More the time a couple spend time together, the long term attachment feeling takes over the infatuation love.
This is the fragile time in a marriage where infatuation fades and long-term attachment also fails to connect.

Even in the famous stories and Movies, we only see the beginning of a new relation and Love blooming, but not the long lasting Love in an elderly couple still in Love.

Attachment between the Couple comes from the satisfaction we get in being with the person we Love, day after day.
I wonder if the mind would then ask "Ok, he/she is with me now...what next"

The glue that keeps the Love ignited are the flirting, dating & intimacy that keeps the chemistry alive.
This diminished intensity could be due to things becoming bit boring as the glitter in the couple's eyes fades.

It will be our choice to remain attached together, treating the relation over Love.

I still remember what my good friend had said once "We always make best efforts to impress someone we love, every time we meet them. We put in efforts to look good, dress well and present ourselves Well each time on a date. You feel you are in love because you like what you are, it all looks beautiful. But you can know a person only when you stay with that person. He/She might not be always looking pretty with makeups, dressed well at home. Will you like when you find your wife getting up with bad hairs in a shabby Nighty? Or with Oily Hair? You always saw her wavy hairs falling on her eyes and each time she used her hands to set her hairs, you were falling in Love all over again. Do you think your wife will like you waking up scratching your butts and farting loudly? Will she like it if you just lie on the Sofa watching sports or a movie one whole Sunday and make faces if she asks you to take her out for Shopping?"

Expectations Vs Reality is where things starts to fall apart. The multi tasking women running around kitchen, cleaning, washing to taking care of family, Worries and work related stress of Men - Love is somewhere lost in the life struggle.

Children could be another factor that eats up most of the couple's precious time together, they start to enjoy the family life, raising the kids, compromising on their time together & their privacy.
Though parenthood is seen as a satisfying and fulfilling experience in a marriage, couple tend to focus way too much on parenthood that they forget to Love and express love to each other as well.

It is evident that the couple have to put in efforts to keep the marriage spiced up, to continue to Love each other, to reignite intimacy amidst the demanding life struggles and to get back the "We Time". There are many smaller yet effective ways to keep Love in the Marriage:

• Going out on a Candle Light Dinner once in a month
• Pressing her legs every night after she is tired running around house, kids, work
• Massaging her legs during those days where she gets cramps
• Pressing his forehead as he hits the bed, to calm him down from the work stress
• Taking bath together once in a month
• Giving him a good head massage every Sunday
• Going on a long drive just to have a Coffee or Ice Cream in the middle of the night
• Taking vacations to romantic destinations, with just two of you
• Kissing each other Goodbye every morning before both head to work
• Go for a good long morning walk over the weekends, and engage in conversations through out the walk
• Surprise her with gifts regularly
• Don't fret if she wants to go to her mom's place
• Celebrate both your birthdays and anniversaries
• How far can you go to woo & convince a disgruntled spouse
• Celebrate both your birthdays and anniversaries.

A couple need to bring in selfless, unconditional, forgiveness, respect for one another in the relation, day in and day out. Trust is another important and essential aspect that helps a couple tide the wave.

Beyond all these intentional efforts to rejuvenate love, I have seen instances/incidents where a couple comes closer and they fall in Love all over again.
When a wife met with an accident and broke her hands, the husband not only took care of her, but ensured she is assisted in every possible way and ensured he was there in every step of hers. He did not let her do any work. The wife was watching it and realized how much the Husband loved and cared for her.

A Husband had a heart attack and the wife was shaken, yet was very strong and took care of her husband. She was right next to the bed and prayed all the time for his recovery. She prayed God that she would mend her ways and would never ever fight with him and keep him happy always, all she wanted is his recovery and he is her world.

Wife's father in his last days; the Husband ensured he took care of the father in law's health, expenses and supported his Wife. He stood there right next to her and that gave her strength to fight her plight and emotions.

In such difficult times and unexpected moments, couples find Love. They realize how much they care for each other and how much they are in Love. The Routine life and the monotony has just fogged their eyes that they don't just see it, which was always there. In the melee, couple confuse love as duty and responsibility.

If we start answering these questions, probably we would know if the love has faded or still alive and kicking:

• Does his Jokes still make me laugh? Do I find him still funny?
• Can I still go out on a date with her and still have a great day and time?
• Can I look into her eyes for hours together and be lost in her beauty?
• Does her smile still makes me forget all my sorrows?
• A hug, a sweet welcome and a Kiss - do I still get this when I get back home from work?
• Do I wait to meet him by end of the day after a hectic day at office?
• Do I still complement her enough when she dresses well?
• Has his bald head, white hairs, bulging tummy made me lose interest in him?
• Am I now getting irritated with her constant chatter, which earlier sounded like birds chirping?
• Am I now getting irritated with his snores, farts which I earlier found cute?
• Do we sleep spooned to each other or we occupy the two ends of the Bed?
• How short can you keep your fights and yellings?

In Search of Truth

IN SEARCH OF TRUTH

by

MURALI MURTHY

Until the Lion learns to speak or write, the world will continue to glorify a Hunter.

Searching the meaning of life, truth, real definition of world and God - can indeed be a daunting task and usually considered crazy in today's world, as we like to believe what we see and trust what is told to us.

Very few dare to go beyond the normal life and above all this superficial and experiential level, in pursuit of deeper meaning of life.

Prajwal is one such truth seeker who is constantly on the lookout to find out the real meaning of life.

Prajwal is a Software Engineer by profession and he is one of the best Architects and has designed and built many systems and solutions to solve some real world problems.
He is an avid reader, and spends most of his free time reading Books. His day always ends with a half read book on his chest and in deep sleep. His weekends are usually spent in Libraries renting/buying new books, and visiting all the book fairs in the town.

He reads philosophical, inspirational, spiritual, great men's life stories, science, astronomical books.

He always found Sky, stars, sun, moon, planets mesmerizing and magnetic.
He even bought a 90X astronomical telescope for exploring the stars and the sky. He never missed any celestial event.

Watching the sky became his passion, and reading about astronomy, science and spirituality became his alternate life.

Yet, he was not content with all the information, as he thought something was still missing.
He wanted to seek more, meaning of life, world, god and had lots of questions in his mind.

Born in a Hindu family, he was taught since childhood that God exists, he controls every actions of ours, he was forced to pray to God, recite hymns that praised Gods, sing devotional songs, and was indirectly threatened that he would be punished by God if he showed disrespect or do wrong things in the eyes of God.

Prajwal was caught between the teachings and preaching by his grandparents on the mythological stories, miracles of heavenly beings and the knowledge he acquired over the years being in the IT industry where he was tuned to use Logic and Science in every thing, and Of course his acquired knowledge in Astronomy.
All these mixed and contradicting knowledge in him kept him exploring more, urge to have clarity.

He was always silenced when he asked questions on the unseen & the unknown, the existence of God and if we are indeed controlled by God. His Grandparents used to tell him that finding God and the truth of life required deep penance. Historically, sages have done penance for years together to see God and find answers.

He was told about Ramakrishna Paramahamsa, Swamy Vivekananda, Gouthama Buddha, Shankaracharya, Madhwacharya, Ramanujacharya and other great Humans who attained enlightenment, which Prajwal failed to understand.

In search of truth and answers, he even attended programs by modern day Gurus and self proclaimed Godmen. But he again found it hypnotic and a bunch of good orators trying to impress their audience with some really good convincing skills and using psychology to keep them interested.

Though many of his friends on a Bar table, were being philosophical after having couple of pegs trying to decipher life, sharing their perspectives; but most of the other times thought he was crazy and out of mind. Most of his friends and colleagues whom he spoke mistook him to be finding God, when he was actually trying to get answers to many unknowns, truth of life.

He makes use of the year end freeze, and plans a solo trip to Himalayas.

Prajwal boards a flight from Bangalore to Kathmandu, and he receives a warm smile from an old man in his early 70s, as he finds his seat next to the old man.

As the flight takes off, both exchange pleasantries and settles down as the flight takes off.

As it's a 3 hour long flight, the old man initiates a conversation with Prajwal "So, you are going to Nepal on work?"

"No sir, want to see Himalayas"

"That's nice, you must be a trekker then?"

"No sir, this is the first time I am visiting Himalayas, and am not into trekking as well, just want to see the great mountains"

"That's nice, you are travelling with a tour operator or with friends?"

"I am travelling alone. How about you Sir?"

"My name is Abdul Huq, and I am a Professor in Psychology. I am visiting Kathmandu to attend a conference. And what do you do?"

"That's good to know sir. I am Prajwal and I work in the IT industry. I work for a Software Development company"

"Nice"

After a quick bite, Prajwal doses off for some time, while Abdul sips on his Coffee and keeps himself busy reading a book.

After a Power nap Prajwal wakes up, uses the Restroom and gets back to his seat. As Prajwal observes Abdul reading a book and also making some notes on a paper, he enquires "If I may know, which book is that sir"
Abdul removes his reading glasses and responds "That's Man's Search for Meaning by one of my idols Dr. Viktor Frankl. I am preparing some notes for the conference in Kathmandu, where I will be talking about the Power of human's intelligence, and our unique potentials"

"Wow. When you asked me earlier why I was going to Himalayas, I stopped myself sharing the real reason, as I thought you would laugh at me"

"Now if you think you can share, try me"

"I am going to Himalayas to find answers. To find the meaning of Life"

"In Himalayas, really?"

"I know I might be sounding stupid, but somehow I have been disturbed with many questions in my mind, that has drawn me towards Himalayas. I don't know what I am expecting there or if I will get what I am seeking, but just another thing that I am putting myself through in the quest of finding the truth"

"Well young man, the flight is about to Land now. My conference is day after tomorrow, I will share you the Auditorium's address and my contact number. Meet me there, if you would like to talk to me"

"Of course Sir, I would love to talk to you. It will be my privilege and thank you for giving me time"

Both found their way out of Tribhuvan International Airport at Kathmandu.
Prajwal had planned to visit Gaurishankar Mountain. Though he was not much into trekking and was not very adventurous, he stuck to exploring the local culture and enjoying the scenic beauty.

With multiple layers of clothing starting from the thermal wear, T Shirt, sweater and a Fleece jacket, Prajwal had his woolen Cap and Synthetic gloves on. His morning expedition to the foothills of the gigantic Gaurishankar, leaves Prajwal speechless and awestruck.
As the Sun rose, the white snow caps turned sheer gold and it was a sight for the sore eyes of Prajwal.

He felt uplifted with the beauty of the magnificent and grand Himalayas.

With such awesomeness in front of him, Prajwal was overjoyed, emotional with many thoughts running in his mind. He kept wandering and exploring the foothills, he rolled down the slopes filled with thick Snow like a child.

Exquisite landscapes, infinite blanket of blue skies with a tinge of white cotton candy cloud cover, was a stairway to heaven.

Prajwal couldn't stop humming the song that was so apt for what he was experiencing

"Ye haseen wadhiyan, yeh khula aasman,
Aa gaye hum kahan, aye mere saajna,
Inn baharon mein dil ki khali khilgayi"

Prajwal spent the entire day in that magical and gorgeous place sipping on the hot chai and was happy to fill his stomach with freshly whipped Omelettes and piping hot Maggi Noodles.

Next day, Prajwal reached the Auditorium where Mr. Abdul Huq was attending the conference. As he saw Mr. Abdul, they both waved at each other, as Prajwal was asked to wait in the Lounge.

As Abdul walk out, both of them walked towards Cafeteria and sat on a table sipping on a Chai, as Abdul jovially asked "So, did you find God?"

"Ha ha...no I didn't. But it was beautiful and mesmerizing Sir. I have never smiled and laughed so much, alone. There is something about Himalayas, something magical, mystical. It's charm is a mystery, intriguing and I kinda lost the grasp of ordinary things."

"Good to know your trip was fruitful"

"It was a lifetime experience, but I am still filled with Questions"

"Tell me, what do you seek, what is bothering you?"

"I need to know the Truth, meaning of life"

"Young man, there is nothing called The Truth, you can only find Your Truth"

"My Truth?"

"Yes, Truth is subjective and we humans perceive truths as per our Convenience and liking. There is no one single gospel truth on any aspect of life. What truth are you seeking?"

"I would like to know the Truth of Life, Meaning of Life, God, these natural wonders, the sky, the stars...are they real, is God real?"

"Firstly, let's define Truth. Truth seekers usually try to find answers for: Does God exists, Is this life and world created by God, Who am I, What is my purpose...there are some who seek answers for After Life, rebirth and so on"

"You are absolutely right, these are some of the specific questions in me. Do you know the answer for these?"

"Like everyone else, I have found answers on my own, based on my own experience in life. Both Science and Religion have many answers to these questions. There's no right or wrong answers. The various religions you come across are efforts in answering these questions"

"I follow Hinduism, and my people have certain answers which I think is contradicting and confusing at many places"

"Exactly...as I said, the truth, meaning of life, God are interpretations of individuals. And the theories they float become religions. Each religion is formed with an idea to answer these questions. It is called a belief system, because people believe in a specific Truth."

"What do you believe, and as per your religion what is the truth?"

"Being a student of psychology, I would want to only help you find Your own Truth and not influence your thoughts with mine.
As I said, each Religion has its own definition of God and Life. Let's take Hinduism for instance, where they strongly advocate the existence of God and God creating the life and the world."

"But I see contradictions in many scriptures"

"Yes there are. As you know, there are multiple sub sects under any religion, including Hindus. Some of them believe Shiva is superior and many others believe Vishnu is superior. It doesn't stop there, though entire Hinduism is based on Vedas and Bhagavatgita, based on how each of them interpret the same texts, some believe the world is real and is created by God, while few believe God created world but is just imaginary and the world doesn't exist in real"

"My contradictions are not only religious beliefs, but the science behind the world and its existence"

"Science has definitions for everything, it works on physics, chemistry, biology and theories for world, happenings, phenomenon and life."

"But there are many unexplainable phenomenon in life which Science is not convincing all the time"

"That's where people conveniently turn to Religion for some mysterious Truths. For example Hindus believe in Rebirth and Souls changing body after death.
In Islam, we do not believe in Idol worship as we don't see God in any particular form, and monotheistic in Nature.
Even we have certain differences in the way we practice Islam - Sunnis and Shias have different ways of interpreting Quran.

Christianity is another monotheistic religion that believes in God. As Christianity is very widely practiced, again the same Bible is interpreted and 100s of sub sects are in practice.

There are many more religions and belief systems being followed in this world. Buddhism, Jainism, Taoism and the list goes on. And each such doctrine was the result of some truth seeker finding his own truth and preaching his truth to others"

"Sir, firstly I am impressed with your immense knowledge and thank you for sharing. So what I understand from this is Truth and meaning of Life is upto us, how we see it and there is no Absolute Truth, but perceived Truths?"

"Absolutely right. As per my understanding of the world, religions and faiths, each of us believe in our own Truths that has been imposed on us. Few seekers like you might come up with your own Truths and understanding of Life and God, how you see it"

"Sir, it was a pleasure meeting you and thank you for your valuable inputs. I respect the multi-cultural information and understanding of all religions that you acquire"

"Best of luck Prajwal. You take care and lead a happy life"

Happy, content and decluttered Prajwal heads back to his world. It had been a rejuvenating, detoxifying trip to Himalayas. Though he is not sure if the mystical beauty of the Himalayan Mountains helped him or Mr. Abdul Huq's informative yet enlightening talk straightened this thoughts.

During his flight back, looking out of the Window, above the clouds, Prajwal knows he didn't find answers nor did he find the meaning of life.
He now realizes meaning of life, encounter with God, understanding of Life are all experiential and each of us have to believe in our own Truths.
Instead of contradicting and being confused, Prajwal realized it is a life time experience that can teach him lessons, can meet his idea of God and the answers & conclusions might again be altered as he comes across new experiences in life.
Prajwal also realized life is not always binaries, as in his Software world. He learnt to live with the superficial & perceived Truths, artificial & materialistic world.

Manly Men

MANLY MEN

by

MURALI MURTHY

After the good viewership of my previous write-up "Gentle Struggles of a Gentlewoman" where I tried to throw light on the general struggles of a woman, It made sense for me to follow up that article with this one.

I thought hard to see the common, general struggles and characterization of a Man, but always ended up with two poles apart examples on each aspect.

Every man has a little bit of Man, Woman, Animal and a Boy in him. We are wired completely different from a woman.
The characteristics, behaviour and response to each situation varies from one Man to another.

We men have the Lust for Power, very ambitious, hunger for more success and never give up attitude. All these characteristics makes us always aim and dream to make it big.

Each of us strongly believe we are more intellectual than others, more sorted than others and more worthy of advising others.
These traits makes us feel superior and this superior feel is termed as Male Ego.
The Male Ego in us, the High self esteem and self pride, tells us to solve our own problems and avoid taking help from others. That's the reason why women feel we hesitate to ask for directions on the Road, when we are confident to find the way out.

Most of our struggles are within, to motivate ourselves to do better, solve problems and set example.

We Men are dedicated and focussed on what we do. When we love a woman, we do it wholeheartedly and won't leave any stone unturned till we win her heart. We woo her, we entertain her, we learn to be funny just to make her happy.
The Love in us never fade and can love a woman for life with same passion and interest. The Boy in us wants to be in Love the same way forever and the expectations from our woman to share same amount of love, intimacy, time, the motherly Affection, attention.

While the Women have lot more to deal with, the gap in reality and the Boyish adamant expectations is a constant struggle we go through.

We have clear distinction with Love and Attraction. Unfortunately, we are attracted to every other women.

Though Women these days participate equally in running the family, the primary responsibility still lies with a man to take care of family, taking care of parents, children education, retirement planning, financial planning, building dream home, investments, maintaining lifestyle standards are the key things that keeps us worried all the time.

We suffer and struggle within emotionally if there is setback in any of the above. Though Men generally don't show their emotions, any setback will break them.

More he breaks, more stronger will he come back with his ability to endure pain, setbacks, trouble.

There are many Men like me who has never given a helping hand in household work, while I have friends who are more than just a helping hand, but equally competent to Cook and clean.
While many are fitness freaks and maintain a toned physique, most of the middle aged Men like me are big tummy uncles.
While many of us are emotionally charged, expressive of our feelings, there are many who are emotionally challenged and in their own world completely focussed on work.

We don many hats and efficeintly carry ourselves as A Loving Father, Caring Husband, dependable friend, Friendly Father, Protective Father, Mad Lover, Responsible Son & an affectionate brother.

Our main struggle is being a Man. Man is synonymous to Male and is identified for being Masculine, Intelligent, Leading the pack, responsible, dutiful, Provider and a Achiever.
The stress and constant endeavour to live up to the expectations (usually self imposed) takes a toll on our health by the time we hit 50.

Most of the Men have this Aptitude to reach inhuman heights, they can disconnect themselves from the materialistic world to become reformers, revolutionists and Saints in search of Truth and Self.

Friends are our lifeline and few friends continue to be around for Life. We find solace and a place to vent out all our frustrations, financial issues, family issues...most of the times over a Beer.

There are lucky few like us, where Friends become our world and wives in the group make it a family. The unlucky few have to struggle and juggle between work life, family time and time for friends and that's where the conflicts arise. Men expect wives to understand the importance of friends in their lives.

We men usually find ourselves stuck between Mother and Wife clashes and stand helpless, Unable to take sides.

The Shopping, Mall outings are a trauma that each of us go through. We find such outings purposeless and unintelligent thing to do.
And the expectation on us to go on a city expedition and weekend outing, are no less than a torture.
All we want to do over the weekend is to sit and do nothing. Relax on our favourite lazy sofa and watch TV, Sports and take time off and de-stress.
Attending some relative's function in the evenings on a weekday or to attend a boring family function is so frustrating, as the last thing we want to do is to Drive in the Traffic after a hectic day / week.

Hair loss, white hairs, growing tummy, ageing parents, growing kids are some of the things that keeps us worried and concerned.

Our expectations from our woman are simple and basic: Time, Space, Freedom, Love, Understanding our needs, romantic or intelligent conversations, while all the work and financial stress constantly bothers us.

Gentle Struggles of a Gentlewoman

GENTLE STRUGGLES OF A GENTLEWOMAN

by

MURALI MURTHY

It's 05:30 in the morning, the alarm irritatingly disturbs her sleep, she is still sleepy as she couldn't sleep properly the previous night. She has no choice but to drag herself out of the bed.

As the clock keeps ticking past 5:40, she knows that much harder it is to race against time. She forcefully gets up, quickly gets ready and runs to the kitchen.

After an hour of non stop work at the kitchen working like Goddess Durga having 8 hands preparing Breakfast, Coffee, Milk and Lunch for the entire family, she helps the kids get up, get them ready to school.

Husband gets up by now with a grumpy face expecting his wife to come to him with a bed coffee with a smiling face, morning kiss and his news paper.

And this is just the beginning of a day in a woman's life, filled with struggles in every step.

I see my wife, my sister, my mother, my aunts, my friends going through the same grind and wrestle with the daily chores without a day off. This unending struggle and monotony hasn't changed from the days of my mother running the show to my wife or my sister in present day. The problems have become more complex as the women now have a career to build as well.

The struggles didn't crop up only after she gets married. The societal, emotional, physical struggles starts the moment she attains puberty. A girl is prepared and trained by the society for what's in store for her for the rest of her life. The day she attains puberty, each day of her life becomes a Classroom and every single person she meets become her teacher, teaching her how to behave, what to wear, how to take care of people, how to cook, how to do household work, how to manage a house. She is groomed to be inferior to men.

She is always scared and concerned of the prying eyes all along. Every single boy, man she comes across is a potential threat to her.

She is judged constantly. Her father, brother, husband, friends, son all trying to be protective of her, giving her a feeling that she cannot protect herself and being felt dominated.

Expectations on her as a daughter, a sister, a girlfriend, a wife and as a mother, always makes her think on ways to up her game every day.

We men have exploited and silenced her all along. She suffers within all the humiliations, abuse, criticism and yet puts a smile on and takes life head on, because she is trained to be so.

And the most craziest turning point of her life - Marriage!
Get married, start living in a stranger's house and start calling some oldies as Mother and Father, treat them as your family and take care of them and their house.

She does all this with a smile and adapts to her new life as this is not strange to her, she is taught since her birth that she has to be prepared for this day.

When the husbands gets sick, or children gets sick, they all need her 100% attention, focus and care as they just rest on the bed. But when she gets sick, she doesn't have a choice but to take medication and push herself to carry on running the Kitchen and house.

She is expected to follow traditions, learn and follow all customs at In-laws places, most of the times unlearning what she has been following all her life till then.

Even if she is being abused and being troubled by husband and in-laws, her parents and brother will ask her to adjust and ask her to go through the struggle, as it is still a stigma to come out of a marriage.

One day I had a tiff with my wife when I was agitated to see her running to her relative's place everyday of her mother's stay in town for almost a week, when just last month she had been to her hometown and spent time with her mother. Her reply was an eye-opener "You stay with your parents all your life and you will never be able to understand my emotions. I have also lived with my parents for 28 years and all of a sudden I have left them, staying away from them for rest of my life".

I have seen women taking care of both parents and in-laws, juggling between 2 houses and still effectively taking care of parent's and in-law's financial, medical and emotional needs.

They sacrifice their dreams, their ambitions to help everyone else achieve theirs. She makes her husband's life hers, husband's dreams as hers, husband's problems hers.
She finds happiness in husband's success and son's success.

We husbands feel we are the only ones capable of handling problems, crisis. When all we do is worry about it, but most of the times the solution and a balm comes from the women of the house.

We Men have Male Ego that stops us from believing they are equally capable emotionally, mentally, intellectually. We take her for granted, impose our thought process and overlook her emotions and feelings

The struggles they have at work place just adds to their misery. The wage gap with fellow male employees, comparison of efficiency at work with a male.

Many families these days expect Women to work and help husband in sharing the financial burden. Be it by her own choice to work or husbands wanting her to work, she has to learn balancing work life and time at home. She has to continue doing all the morning chores at home, run to work, come back and continue her work in the kitchen, cleaning house without time to catch her breath.
If she gets back home late from work, she has to first cross the grumpy faced in-laws staring at the clock, making her realize she has sinned.

Despite all the struggles, running around, doing her best, she never gets to hear a "Thank you", "Good Job" or an appreciation for a well cooked food or a well kept home.

The indecent proposals many women get from random/known men is another silent struggle she goes through. It's a silent struggle she generally has to suffer alone. Most of the times solve it alone or take help from Husband, Brother, Father or friends to get rid of the proposers.

She realizes that Love has faded away within few years of marriage. She is made to feel that she is the reason for lessening of Love in the marriage. The same woman whom his man found charm, beauty and attraction before and in few years of marriage, has started finding her not attractive, boring and out of shape.
She is always compared with other Women, as every man finds other women always attractive.

We Men will never be able to understand the other physical pains they go through...Be it waxing, threading, facials, shampooing and drying their hairs, hair styling, pedicure and those tight Bras and the discomforts.

And those days of the month...their mood swings, cramps, stomach aches, discomfort, and running to Restroom regularly, yet hiding the Pads. Period related problems are still a stigma in our society.

A Man can smoke and occasionally drink and yet considered normal, but when a woman is found smoking in a corner, the same Men give a stare at her with eyes wide open. And the moment a group of women get into a Pub just to have a good time, men at all other tables will always have an eye on this table.

She compromises and adjusts all her life. She adapts to every situation and problem.

Having written so much about women and their problem, loving my wife, mother and sister, I am still the reason for many of their struggles.

Women are the reason for our existence, not just biologically. They guide us, make us humans, and help us emotionally as a mother, sister, friend, lover, wife, daughter, aunt or as a grand mother.

The least we men can do is let them help win their battles and struggles each day.

I believe that God created Men first, and quickly realized that Men are A$$holes. God had to then design and create Women to balance life - with a woman's composure, forgiveness, ability to take men out of any mess, give them Love and ability to provide emotional support and become their strength.

The saying "Behind every successful Man, there is a Woman" wasn't said just like that.

I have seen my own sister rise above all her struggles, make a mark for herself in the family, society. Many women like my sister have taken up post graduation much later after marriage and started a career afresh and emerged successful, continuing to fulfill all the domestic needs and duties.

What will we do with all the Men, if all Women are Empowered!

This write-up is not to talk about feminism or women empowerment. This is to salute and acknowledge the struggle women go through each day.

Some of the women whose pain, struggle and compromises that I have seen and felt personally: